Tag: 1980s

Review: Three Week Professionals

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Three Week Professionals

Though not the deepest sports book, Ted Kluck’s Three Week Professionals tells the story of the 1987 NFL replacement players with humor and the right tone. On one hand, the players had more of a justification for striking than was often the case given the lack of free agency and the sport being incredibly harsh. On the other, it was poorly handled and working-class people even at the time thought little of it.

As both a time capsule and a short breezy history, this book is good. Not deep, but it’s not supposed to be. It is fun and that’s what matters.

Review: Raven

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Raven

William Kinsolving’s 1983 novel Raven is an aviation pop epic about one Buck Faulkner and his family. Faulkner starts his aviation company in the 1930s, which starts with a 21 seat airliner and moves up. Like many other traditional pop epics of the time, we get a mixture of semi-spicy personal drama and big picture discussion about airline orders.

This is no technothriller and Kinsolving is clearly just modeling the planes on famous existing ones. However, (and this sounds like faint praise), he at least knows the basics. This is no Ian Slater. Some of the names may be a little goofy, but that’s it.

As for the novel itself, it’s a good 51% book. It’s not the absolute greatest, but as a brief time passer, it works. Plus it manages to avoid at least some of the pitfalls of authors writing about technology, so it has that in its favor.

Review: Earth Fire

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Earth Fire

The ninth Survivalist book and end of the de facto first arc is Earth Fire. It takes the “western Fist of the North Star” theme to its climax as John Rourke prepares his shelter for the firestorm engulfing the world and moves to stop the main Soviet antagonist from using the other suspended animation shelter in Cheyenne Mountain.

I’ve mentioned many times that this was an ideal stopping point for the series. Take this perfectly fine arc and the beginning of Book 10 where Rourke wakes up after the timeskip and sees the Eden Project spaceship lifeboat return and you have an excellent self-contained narrative. As it stood, the series kind of meandered on, becoming first a pet sci-fi setting and then hurriedly sputtering out after 1991.

In fact, later arcs would render this much less important via retcons. Here the Soviet Politburo is shot down as they attempt to reach Cheyenne Mountain because they don’t have a viable shelter of their own. Later on it turns out that the Soviets indeed had an underground city after all! And the Argentines, and the Icelanders, and pretty much everyone! How about that!

Still, this is a fine piece of ridiculous 80s excessive men’s adventure, and can be appreciated for what it is. The later sourness doesn’t make this any less sweet.

Review: The Last of the Dog Team

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The Last of the Dog Team

William W. Johnstone said that of all his many, many writings, The Last of the Dog Team was his proudest work. This is yet more proof that his ability to judge what made a “good” book was lacking. As if the dozens and dozens of terrible slop on paper wasn’t enough evidence.

Anyway, The Last of the Dog Team is about Terry Kovak, a poor boy turned supercommando. Or rather, it’s mostly about his, uh, “love life”. See, he has the magic power of making women want him desperately. If he really was a secret agent, he’d be perfect for Romeo Gambits. The plot, such as it is, is of a violent lunatic (ie, Kovak) killing people in his hometown, in Southeast Asia, and in Africa before returning to a reluctant retirement and then dying of natural causes.

The prose is bad and erratic even by Johnstone’s standards, veering between Exclamation Points!, long syrupy purple prose, and lines like “He felt drained-which he was. He felt sick”. And yet the key factor is its pretentiousness. It’s clear that Johnstone wanted to write some sweeping epic saga of a man’s life yet had simply no idea how to do so without throwing in another sex or killing scene. This sort of overreach (much of the Ashes series is a redneck convinced he’s Larry Bond) is something WWJ had and many other bottom-feeder thrillers (including the later “William W. Johnstone’s” did not.

Since this was an early book of his, I could forgive Johnstone if he got better. He didn’t.

A Thousand Words: Air Crew

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Air Crew

1980’s Air Crew (sometimes translated as “Flight Crew” or “The Crew“) was the USSR’s attempt to copy the Airport-style disaster movie. The first half is an incredibly slow episode of Aeroflot: The Soap Opera and features such white-knuckle thrills as a child custody hearing (not kidding), but the second is pure 70s disaster cheesy fun.

The plane lands in the most treacherous fictional airport in the most treacherous fictional land, and its crew then confronts a simultaneous earthquake-flood-firestorm. Getting off the ground is just the start, leading to a ridiculous and ridiculously fun conclusion that involves members of the cockpit crew bundling up and going outside as if they were cosmonauts on a spacewalk and climaxes with geography ceasing to make sense.

As a time filler, you could do a lot worse than this movie.

A Thousand Words: Friday The 13th

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Friday The 13th

Of all the things to lead to a genre-defining series, the original Friday The 13th movie (yes, I did choose a Friday the 13th to review that movie) is one of the most bizarre and mystifying. Instead of the iconic hockey-masked monster, there’s a middle-aged woman and a vague attempt at a mystery. Not one element of it stands out from the pack of later slashers. If it had been made as little as a year later, no one would have paid it any mind.

The plot is simple: A bunch of would-be camp counselors are killed by a vengeful mother until one of them, Final Girl Alice, turns the tables and kills her. Yet it was in the right place and the right time, and the rest is history.

(Weirdly, the later and more goofy Friday films are actually the best-made, but that’s a story for another post).

Elvis Presto

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It’s no secret that Super Bowl halftime shows prior to Michael Jackson’s historic 1993 one were rightfully regarded as throwaway novelty acts. But one in particular stands out for its “questionable” judgement. That would be 1989’s Elvis Presto.

Now there wasn’t a successful Elvis impersonator thirteen years after the death of the real one known as “Elvis Presto” already. Nor was it someone famous already doing an Elvis impression. No, this was just an Elvis impersonator doing silly magic tricks and music. Ok, that’s still in the ballpark of what old halftime shows were like, except for the small problem of that, save for one snippet of Burning Love…

NONE OF THE SONGS HE SANG WERE ACTUAL ELVIS PRESLEY ONES

It’s like “why?” It’s not like he was known as the “king of rock and roll”? I’m sure they could, with difficulty, find fifteen minutes of worthy Elvis songs to play. I mean, he was one of those artists who didn’t really record much mater-oh wait.

Yeah, there’s a reason why halftime shows are now filled with star power.

A Thousand Words: Fat Man And Little Boy

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Fat Man And Little Boy

Before there was Oppenheimer, there was 1989’s Fat Man and Little Boy, a far less well received movie about the development of the nuclear bomb starring Paul Newman as Leslie Groves and Dwight Schultz as Robert Oppenheimer. Knowing its reputation and knowing my interest in the subject matter, I felt I had to check it out.

Most of the critiques are accurate. The movie does treat the making of the nuclear bomb as a hokey war movie with Newman and Schultz as the cliche general and scientist right out of central casting. The movie is VERY clear on what side its makers are taking in the debate about nuclear weapons (it’s uh, not that of Curtis Lemay) and is not subtle in its points. And yes, it’s historically inaccurate in many ways.

Yet it’s still better than I thought it would be. For all those legitimate issues, it’s a technically well made movie. It may be a hokey war movie, but its direction and (especially) sets are solid. Even the final scene when the bomb finally detonates (spoiler) is interesting in that the filmakers obviously knew they couldn’t do the explosion justice with the effects of the time so they chose an indirect vision that’s surprisingly effective.

It’s not the best film ever, but it doesn’t quite deserve the scorn its gotten. Plus Ennio Morricone’s score is typically amazing.

A Thousand Words: The Natural

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The Natural (Movie)

There are several things that are all true about the Robert Redford movie The Natural, the baseball story that “adapts” Bernard Malamud’s novel of the same name to the screen.

  • It is a shallow and sugary but well-shot and well-made movie.
  • It is about as faithful to the original novel as a Minnesota politician is to her husband.
  • It’s perhaps the most prominent sports alternate history ever made.

The first part needs the least explanation, except to highlight how amazing Randy Newman’s score is. The second part is the more interesting to explain. See, the novel is in many ways just as shallow as the movie, while being far more mean spirited and, frankly, dull. One great inherent part about filmmaking is that via the trick of “the ball hits something which goes boom”, you can see what awesome thing Roy Hobbs did instead of just having someone say “he lead the league in homers and triples and hit lots of home runs until his character brought him down.”

The final point needs some attention. See, Roy Hobbs and the New York Knights obviously did not actually exist, much less win the 1939 National League pennant. But a more important thing is that instead of taking place in a vague “sometime in the past” the way the book did, this has a specific date (1939), and said date is several decades before the filming and release of the movie. If that’s not alternate history, than what is?